Okay, I would like to state how MY mind deals with anger...at certain individual/s...If I dont express this to that person/s it gets converted to hyperactivity, a short attention span, hightened randomness and more importantly....a very short fuse.
I experienced the first three from the moment I woke up yesterday morning...went biking, worked out and actually cleaned my room...I then pigged out on ice-cream while chatting with grace and sham...
Was being damn random but cohesively humorous...theres no sport in disturbing sham cause she makes me feel guilty, whenever i do...though grace is still surprisingly 'quick on the draw'....
Haha...the beauty of properly misdirected anger...Even grace asked "should i be scared or worried?"...classic
But, then theres still the last...'Symptom'...The short fuse
So...I decided to allow myself talk to some people whom...I dont exactly, have 'goodwill' toward...and when I say people, I dont mean just one...It may come as a surprise to them; but hey I tried to look past it, sometimes its just to crystal freakin clear... cant see that person with the same trust and empathy you saw them before...I'm not hypersensitive but somethings are just too close to let some else take a piss on...Only when the shit hits you in the face, you learn to duck or get out...I've done the first, didnt work, so plan B...I fight my own fights...I think these people are patronzing, antagonzing, malicious, superficial, hypocrtical, immature, untruthful and the worst...ignorant...I dont know if I'm a generally nice person...Hell, I dont really care...But for fuck sake dont push someone just because they're patient and 'nice' to you about the shit you throw their way...I'm patient, but I hate people who test it... And I hate people who lie while knowing that another person might be royally fucked; in every sense of the word, because of it...Who cares right?...Well a 'friend' would...I wonder if it was just to watch me squirm in my indecision...So thank you for lieing to me cause I would have never seen you for who you really are...
I hope to god no one ask's for an explanation...Because I will blow this way out of proportion just to see what happens...since everyone loves to test and push the limit....Frankly, the things I have to say will not be nice, to say the least...And for the record, I'm not angry...Not yet...Fuck with some else, I've seen a million people change but I'll stay the same...But I sure as hell dont know you anymore...I refuse to...Hmph...Guess I was a hypocrite for a little bit eh?...Never again...
P.S. Your friendship and good times we had...You can have them back
BYE.
2:20 AM